9 Types Of Sex To Reignite The Spark In Your Marriage
Eventually, if the relationship survives, the couple develops a style of intimacy that works for them. A couple who’ve made it this far feels more secure, more settled. Now the settled partnership issues come up: how to keep love alive over a long period of time; how not to take each other for granted; how to set goals beyond just being together; and how to handle changes.
Settled partnership is the stage where the pleasures of lasting love are realized. At this point, successful couples know they’re loved as they really are. They have become experts in living life together. When all goes well, the couple has a feeling of security, intimacy and partnership that’s truly satisfying and rewarding. When problems arise, they have the wisdom and experience to keep their commitment alive through cooperation and mutual understanding.
However, it takes several years to achieve the full benefits of these later stages. Unless you’ve been through a very long-term relationship before, it’s hard to understand the difficulties encountered in the development of intimacy stage and the settled partnership phase. It’s easy to be discouraged and give up. People often do much better in their second or third long-term relationships because their early experience taught them what to expect, and gave them a chance to acquire the necessary long-term skills. Because we lack education and experience, our early unsuccessful relationships often serve as practice for later successful ones.
Here are four simple steps to create a successful marriage:
1. Talk frequently and honestly to each other—about your frustrations, about sex, about anger, about disappointment, about your appreciation of each other, about the meaning of life, about everything.
2. Strive to work together to solve anything that comes up — be a team, a partnership. Don’t get stuck on who’s right or wrong. Focus on what will solve the problem.
3. Keep your connection going through communication, sex, affection, understanding and concern for each other.
4. Have a sense of humor; give the benefit of the doubt, care about each other.
When your relationship lasts for a while, your lovemaking will change. As you get closer, passion no longer grows automatically out of the excitement of the new and unknown.
Rather than allowing your energy to subside, you can allow your lovemaking to change and grow, deepening as your partnership does. Couples who develop a”sexual repertoire which includes a variety of sexual habits, attitudes and options report feeling more satisfaction and freedom to express their love with enough variety that they never get bored. These suggestions will help you create a variety of experiences together.
More on next page…
