The 50 Most Useful Marriage Tips EVER!
11. Nothing is more important in a marriage than the relationship between husband and wife.
When other things become more important, such as careers, children, and personal pursuits, trouble sets in. Make the relationship your top priority. When you do, the marriage flourishes. – Cathy Meyer, CPC, MCC
12. Are you creating more pleasurable interactions in your marriage or are you making it painful or unpleasant for your spouse?
If your spouse treats you with kindness, gentleness, patience and self-control, it’s easy for you to respond kindly. If you are treated badly, with anger, impatience, etc., it’s difficult to be nice in return. Focus on how you can be a blessing to your spouse and, in turn, you will be blessed and so will your marriage. – Mack Har
13. Never begin a sentence with the word ‘you’.
Instead start with the word “I” and then share your feelings instead of your thoughts. This is not as easy as it sounds because we all disguise a lot of thoughts as feelings, as in “I feel like you are avoiding me.” Genuine feelings are sad, angry, happy, lonely, frustrated, etc … and sharing your core feelings creates better communication, and more connection and compassion. – Veronica Monet, ACS, CAM
14. Change your focus to one of learning to appreciate your partner. – Michelle Poll, CPC, MA
15. Let go of criticism and blame.
Focus on what there is to appreciate about your mate, then honestly and spontaneously express your specific appreciation to them. It’s also good to do this for yourself. – Judith Joyce, Life Coach
16. Never lose the fine art of dating.
Setting aside a romantic evening on a regular basis can rekindle the magic of a long-term relationship. It doesn’t have to be fancy, just special time for the two of you to remember how and why you first fell in love. – John Sovec, LMFT
17. Have regular times, even if it’s just for 15 minutes, to check in on your relationship and what you appreciate about each other.
No talk about kids, schedules, etc. allowed. – Mary Kay Aide, MS
18. Love your marriage by first taking care of yourself.
So many of my patients say the reason their marriage fell apart is that they became depressed and disinterested in their partner. If you keep working on you, your marriage will stay fresh and vital. Start today by adding a new wedding vow to your list: Promise to take care of yourself so you will continue to age with grace and confidence by your partner’s side. – Mary Jo Rapini, LPC
19. Recognize that your husband or wife is mirroring back to you who you are.
So take whatever you’re upset with him/her about and use it to help yourself look squarely at what you need to do in order to grow and evolve—the relationship will thrive! – Ilene Dillon, LCSW, LMFT
20. Take time to have some fun together every day!
With today’s hectic schedules, it’s easy to find your marriage at the bottom of the priority list. Take a walk and hold hands (nature calms), couple-cook (food fight!), exercise together (tennis or dancing maybe?) or just collect a “Daily Joke” to share. It doesn’t have to be expensive, but if you make the commitment and effort to laugh together as often as possible, it can sweeten your connection and cement your relationship for life. – Melodie Tucker, CPC
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